2D High School-- After Thanos
by 2DaMaster
Summary: Paul is just a normal 20 year old who has to attend high school with other 20 year olds because of what happened after Thanos killed half the population but then the Avengers saved everyone. Basically just a normal coming of age story but with action, romance, and some cameos by other characters from pop culture.
1. Prologue

2D High School: Life After Thanos

Chapter 1: Prologue

Paul was miserable. Home room was the most miserable shit 5 years ago before Thanos had snapped away half of the universe's population, let alone now that everyone was far too old. "I'm too fucking tired to take a math exam today, I just broke up with Princess Anna from Frozen last night" Paul vented to Elle. "I don't want to take an exam either, but Principal Beto O' Rourke said we need to start getting back into taking exams including math exams if we ever want to graduate before we're 25. We're already 20 but we're still in high school thanks to Thanos", Elle explained. Paul scoffed because he knew Elle just had a crush on Principal O'Rourke and did not care about math exams. "This is bullshit" complained Paul in his mind.

If you hadn't figured it out yet, Paul had recently had to return to high school due to the defeat of Thanos, the mad titan. Five years ago Thanos had murdered half the universe with the six infinity stones and the infinity gauntlet, but Paul and Elle had survived. While everyone was dead though they put a hold on high school, and now that Thanos had been defeated and everyone was alive again he had to go back to school. As a result, everyone in the high school was 20 years old or older, which was "completely fucked" if you were to ask Paul his thoughts. He hated school, especially after being given a break for five years. The stress caused him to break up with his now ex-girlfriend Princess Anna from Frozen as they had grown apart and this was his first day back.

"Alright class, please take your seats" said Paul's homeroom teacher Camden. Camden was just a normal teacher, he wasn't unusually old or anything and just taught normally. Paul thought he was an alright teacher but to be honest he was just too fucking pissed at being at high school right now, especially on account of his breakup last night. "I have a homework assignment for you all, it's a topic for discussion" Camden said. "Is it about cannibalism?" asked Arjun excitedly. Arjun was in Paul's class and like everyone else was 20 or older because of Thanos. Arjun was always talking about cannibalism, Paul thought he made some good arguments about it but wasn't really interested in eating human meat, especially not in the schools cafeteria where the food was not very good outside of pizza day. "Open poll!" exclaimed Niall Horan, a really cool guy who was in the school band and theater plays, before Camden could get a word in edgewise. "Hoho, not today Arjun" said Camden, "but I do want you guys to come prepared with any opinions for us to discuss tomorrow morning. Just remember the high school rules." The bell then rang. "Good grief" Paul thought exasperatedly, "homework on the first day and from Camden who is generally the nicer teacher. What have I gotten myself into?" he wondered as he left the room. On his way out he looked to his right to complain to whomstever was standing there, but he accidentally made contact with Anna from Frozen, his ex-girlfriend. "Shit!" Paul exclaimed under his breath embarrassed as he ran away from the room, running out the door.

Paul was running so fast and so quickly that before he knew it he had run into something, or someone. "Oof!" grunted Paul in exasperation as he collided. He had collided with Daniel, the school tough guy. Daniel was accompanied as always by his two cronies, Donkey from Shrek and 20-year old Mayor Rudy Guiliani, who had been turned 20 by the power of the time stone when Thanos attacked and now had to go to high school with everyone else. They were the only ones who would hang out with Daniel, but they were strong enough to let him be a bully, especially to people like Paul. "Well well well" said Daniel, "If it isn't Paully. Why don't you watch where you're going Paully?". Daniel then laughed threateningly but dumbly, Paul noticed. "Hey Daniel, you did a great job scarring him" said 20 year old Mayor Guiliani, giving Daniel a high five. "I'm making waffles" said Donkey, making another random joke as he often did. Paul decided he didn't have time for these assholes right now when he needed to get to class, so he decided to leave and go to class before the next bell rang. "This isn't over!" bellowed Daniel as Paul left. "So far", Paul thought glumly, "this had been as shit of a day as I had expected it would be".

Paul then went to science class, where Daniella had been talking about water and the environment. Daniella had a reputation for being the meanest and toughest teacher at the school, even before Thanos had killed half the population before his defeat. "Woah, there are a lot of people in this class who I know" thought Paul. He realized that all of the cheerleaders were there as well. It looked like the head cheerleader Rebecca and her friends the twins were currently bullying Shalaka, who was from Boston, but Paul was too tired and devil-may-care to care at that specific moment in tim, and he didn't know Shalaka too well as she had just moved to 2D High from Boston. Rebecca was the teachers pet and while Daniella was nice to her, it really pissed Paul off to see that shit sometimes. After the bell rang Daniella said "Everyone be silent, the bell rang so it is time for us to talk about water faucets". "But teacher, we thought when you said running water you meant you wanted us to be running our mouths!" said Apratim jokingly. Apratim was the class clown and had spent the five years in which Thanos had killed half of all life in the universe becoming a comedian. He had to return to high school now but he was the funniest guy in the school, and everyone including Daniella who normally never laughed was laughing hilariously at his funny joke. "Damn, if I were that funny I may not have broken up with Anna from Frozen, fuck this shit" thought Paul glumly once he had stopped crying from laughter at how good the joke was. Suddenly, Daniella broke through the laughter to say "Shalaka, Rebecca is much smarter than you when it comes to my class". The whole class went "oooooh" as if Shalaka had just been called to the principal's office. Paul saw Shalaka go red in the face as Rebecca and the twins smiled smugly, but then he saw something in her eyes snap as she lost it. "All right, are we gonna have a problem?" Shalaka asked Daniella in a Boston accent. Daniella was cool as a cucumber as she smirked and replied with "There's no problem. I was just hoping you could give me some insight into the evolution of the market economy in the early colonies. My contention is that prior to the Revolutionary War the economic"… but then Shalaka had interrupted her, red in the face and in control. Paul took one look at her and thought, "she is fed-up". Shalaka then said, "Of course that's your contention. You're a first year grad student. You just finished some Marxian historian, Pete Garrison prob'ly, and so naturally that's what you believe until next month when you get to James Lemon and get convinced Virginia and Pennsylvania were strongly entrepreneurial and capitalist back in 1740. That'll last until sometime in your second year, then you'll be in here regurgitating Gordon Wood about the Pre-revolutionary utopia and the capital-forming effects of military mobilization." That had completely shut Daniella up. "See? I'm wicked smart" said Shalaka. Paul and the rest of the class were completely dumbfucked by what they had just witnessed, but Paul made a mental note to befriend Shalaka in the near future, as she could be a powerful ally against Daniel and his cronies, and on top of it all he was extremely doubtful that Daniella and Rebecca would stop antagonizing her as well.

In the aftermath of that stunning display, school was now over. Paul was ready to go home and go onto twitter, as he was really excited to look up memes of Jon Snow from Game of Thrones. He was also depressed at the moment on account of his breakup and his awfully shitty school day. On his way out he ran into the Vice Principal Joe, who was hanging out with someone in a giant Minion from Despicable Me costume who Paul could only assume was one of his classmates who was the football mascot. Joe was very old, even way older than Camden and Daniella, but he was very kind to Paul. "Paul, you look kind of glum" said Joe as the person in the minion costume began to dance to and fro as if there was a football game happening at the time, which there wasn't. "You may feel frustrated right now, but people grow apart for a reason. You and Anna from Frozen just weren't to be, and even though school is frustrating in the aftermath of Thanos killing half of the universe and then being defeated, I'm still confident you will enjoy your time here". Paul highly doubted that the old man would be correct, as he was a boomer, but for some reason his words made him feel better. "Hey… thanks" smirked Paul as he walked home. Maybe school wasn't as bullshit as he had thought.

So that's my story. This is just the first day of my first day of school, so please look forward to future updates as I eventually save 2D High from our enemies and get the girl, all while passing my math exam! Catch you later, and thanks for reading. Paul out. [Chapter 1 end]


	2. Trouble Arrives

2D High Chapter 2: Trouble Arises

"God dammit, time for another shitty ass day of high school even though I'm 20 years old" mused Paul frustratingly. It was going to be a long day, he was sure of it down in his bones. It was already a few weeks into the school year since the last chapter, and not much had changed since last time. Everyone was still 20 or older thanks to Thanos. Paul was still being bullied by Daniel, Donkey from Shrek, and 20 year old Rudy Guiliani who was de-aged thanks to Thanos using the power of the time stone. "Tell me about it" said Shalaka in a Boston accent, as she was now friends with Paul and they now hung out in homeroom and talked to each other. "I saw Daniel and Rebecca hanging out near the bubbler on the walk in. I want to just slam them in the barrel". Barrel meant trash can in Boston, Paul had quickly found out after at first being confused when he befriended Shalaka. It was hard at first for him to adjust to all the boston slang, but she was good at showing up those assholes on account of how smart she was so he couldn't complain much personally. "Hey Paul, congrats on getting such a good grade on the math exam! We should start calling you Sheldon" said Ben, another one of Paul's classmates who of course was at least 20 years old. Paul knew that Ben was referring to Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, a fictional character from a hugely popular CBS sitcom. Sheldon was kind of a nerd but he was super smart and also a gamer, which Paul thought was really cool. They even played Wii in one episode and the show was so popular that it was on TV for 12 seasons, even throughout the time during which 50% of all life in the universe was killed by Thanos. "Uh… thanks." said Paul with an aloof reply.

"Alright class" said Camden, Paul's homeroom teacher. "Who has a topic for discussion for us this morning?" "I do!" said Jacquiline. "This is going to be some shit" quickly realized Paul to himself, "Jacquiline never has good topics for homeroom in the past". "I think that topics like depression can be especially funny to make jokes about, especially if you make them at the expense of people who are suffering from a serious illness like depression" continued Jacquiline, "and if people don't laugh at that joke then they are just haters and are jelly". The whole classroom immediately booed Jacquiline with a strength that Paul had never seen before, even in homeroom. The fact that everyone was at least 20 or older made the boos even louders as a consequence of everyone having more developed vocal cords and lung capacity than your typical high school class may otherwise have. "Jesus Christ." said Adam. "Your expelled" said Camden immediately, at which point Paul never saw Jacquiline again. "Yare Yare Daze" said Jotaro Kujo, the cool super buff man with a hat that blended into his hair and was always talking about dolphins. Paul knew that that meant "good grief", more or less. "That was some wicked shit" gasped Shalaka under her breath to Paul, to which Paul sleepily nodded. Luckily homeroom was over so he could escape the bullshit of being in class, even though he did like hanging out with Shalaka.

Paul had to go to gym class next, but he wanted to avoid Daniel, Rebecca and their cronies so he avoided the water fountain and instead went outside to walk towards the gym. The whole way to the gym Paul lamented over the fucked up shit that every day brought him in this school full of bastards and assholes. "Hey Paul, did you see the news?" said a familiar voice. It was Charlie Day, the famous actor. Thanos had used the mind stone to make Charlie Day to always want to eat all the time and never exercise or take care of himself, so now he was 80lbs heavier but still funny and a good friend. "Oh, hey Charlie Day!" said Paul. "Finally, someone actually cool" he thought with excitement and hope that today at school may actually be fun. There was a very awkward pause for a second, which confused Paul. "Oh, I'm not Charlie Day, I'm Alex" said the person. "Oh" realized Paul with a truly sickening feeling in his very stomach. He always got those two confused. He walked away in a sullen silence because he was not friends with Alex. He then walked to the football field where they would be having gym class since it was such a bright and sunny day outside, and when it was sunny like that they always had gym class outside. He really hoped that he didn't get picked on the same team for dodgeball as Anna from Frozen, his ex-girlfriend. But he also didn't want to be on the same team as Alex, Daniel, Rebecca, or the rest. He saw the gym teacher Claudia giving instruction to the school mascot, who was wearing a gigantic Minion from Despicable Me costume. They seemed to be getting along very well, which made sense to Paul because Claudia was generally considered the best teacher at the school and had been the one to select the new mascot after Thanos was defeated and half of the population of the universe returned to life. The person in the Minion costume was holding their arms as if they were flexing biceps, even though the costume did not have muscles. "Badass" told Paul to the person in the Minion costume, at which point the person in the mascot costume began to take the costume off. But before they had the chance to do that, there was suddenly a commotion that chilled Paul to his core, even though he was used to shitty bullshit at high school and didn't even want to be there on your average day more likely than not.

Of all the people it could have been, it was Bagel Boss, principal of their rival highschool ED High. "God dammit" sighed Paul for the last time. "I hate women, and I'm here to be the bagel guy!" said the Bagel Boss, who was very famous at this exact moment in time. His high school was new. It was originally part of 2D High, but everyone who was too creepy was kicked out. They created their own high school after the fact. "Oh, that's your mascot, a minion? Show some sympathy for the devil!" said Justin, who's bullshit Paul could not fucking stand. "We brought our mascot too!" it was at that point that the ED High Rock'N Roller, who looked like Elvis, came out. Everyone at ED High loved rock music, Paul knew. Personally Paul hated rock music, and only liked R&B, pop, and rap. He never even discussed rock music because he hated it so much, as it was shit. "Hello ladies, I'm a hunk a hunk of burning love", said Ethan, who was also there as a student of ED High. "Why are you incels here?" angrily accused Hannah, who Paul realized had walked up to the football field for gym class as well. "I thought your high school was banned from our campus." Ethan had a total fucking meltdown in response to that. Paul realized that, in fact, that was true. He also began to wonder why they were there. "Hey, just take it easy man" said Drake Bell, one of the coolest students at 2D High. Paul looked over to Drake Bell to see who he was talking to. It was Ivankov, who was menacingly advancing towards all of the gym class. "We may have been banned from the school and forced to be livin' on a prayer" gurgled out Ivankov in a fake Greek accent, "but now this is a highway to hell… and you've got a ticket to ride!"

What will happen next? Please stay tuned for Chapter 3, which will resolve this epic cliffhanger.


	3. Smoke on the Water

III. Smoke on the Water

"We may have been banned from the highschool and forced to be livin' on a prayer" gurgled out Ivankov in a fake Greek accent, "but now this is a highway to hell… and you've got a ticket to ride!" Not a moment had passed since the ED Student had somehow excreted those words from his lips. Paul was filled with a terrifying fear that he had not since experienced since Thanos had wiped out exactly half of the population of the universe, it was the reason everyone in his high school was at least 20 years old or older after all. But Thanos had been defeated and now everyone was back and in high school, and now Paul was half Frozen in fear. But Paul had been having too shitty of a day to put up with this dickbag, even despite of being in so much fear. "Hey dickbag", shouted Paul at Ivankov without the slightest hint of the true dread he was feeling in his core, "Leave them alone and just tell me why the fuck you are wasting all of our time with this shit". Shocked and quivering with fear but for just a moment, Ivankov quickly recomposed himself with an insidious smirk. He then began creeping towards Paul with a slovenly gait. Paul realized he should have been paying careful attention to his enemy on account of his innate sense of dread that he had been feeling ever since the four had arrived on the spot, but he had suddenly been distracted by the high school mascot, the person in the suit that resembled the Minion from Despicable Me. The mascot was tapping it's foot on the ground impatiently with it's arms crossed, and looked down at it's wrist and tapped it showingly as if checking a watch, even though there was no watch there. It was due to this distraction that it was only when it was too late that Paul saw the knife in Ivankov's grubby little paws. "… Bazinga" whispered Ivankov to Paul such that only Paul would ever hear, not that he would be able to tell anyone else. "God dammi-" Paul began to sigh, but before he could finish he was dead, dead before he hit the ground. Paul's last thought as he died and failed to finish his sigh was hearing someone scream in terror as Ivankov laughed evilly.

******************Three Months Later********************************

"Alright class, time for a new topic of discussion" said Camden, the homeroom teacher of class 2DG, with a smile; although an astute observer would have noticed the heavy veil of sadness behind his slim veneer of normalcy. Principle O'Rourke was one such man, he thought to himself. The veil of sadness had been hidden behind the veneer of normalcy of every teacher for the past three months ever since Paul had been murdered by Ivankov and the students of EDG. Well, everyone except Daniella, Principle O'Rourke conceded to himself. "We thought we had seen the end of death, the end of mindless Chaos, when Thanos was defeated" Principle O'Rourke mused quietly to himself while shaking his head with regret, "but even with the defeat of the mad titan, death still remains". But goddamit, why did it have to be to one of his students? Principle O'Rourke just didn't understand what kind of shitty god would do this to such an innocent kid. He never new him personally while he was still alive, but according to his classmate and friend Shalaka, who was still alive, he and the Principle himself actually had a lot on common. "That's twisted as fuck, but even more depressing on account of that" Principle O'Rourke sullenly mused to himself. His therapist and his wife, even students such as Elle and Anna from Frozen who was crying all the time on account that Paul was her ex-girlfriend but she still had feelings for him, all were telling him that he needed to forgive himself and move on, but they were out of their goddamn minds if they thought he'd let this shit go, especially at a time like this. He knew that the key to why Paul had to die, and why Ivankov had to kill him, was hidden behind the recent disappearance of the three students Daniel, Donkey from Shrek, and 20 year old Mayor Guiliani who had been de-aged and forced to return to high school as a result of Thanos's use and abuse of the time stone.

But until he could find those students, Principle O'Rourke was determined to monitor every single classroom every day he could to look out for any suspicious or evil activity. Class 2DG was discussing a new topic of discussion. "Gang gang" said Joey. Principle O'Rourke thought that was a particular stupid and vapid statement, but with a chuckle he guessed that was the kind of classic bullshit that 20 year olds got up to. He wasn't used to that, being a high school teacher. But now his school was full of 20 year olds because of Thanos. It all came back to Thanos. Joey's comment had somehow lead to a contentious conversation that lasted almost the whole homeroom period, but Principle O'Rourke was too tortured and focused on avenging Paul to listen. The least he could hear was that the student named Eric kept talking about "Pillow chicken", apparently a food recipe that he had invented and never shutted up about, if Elle was to be believed. "That sounds really good" thought Principle O'Rourke, breaking from his reverie. But then the bell rang, and it was time to monitor the next class.

The next class was Anime and Manga theory, taught by Olin. Principle O'Rourke knew that this was all of the students favorite class, and it was hard not to see why. Olin kept making really funny Jojo references, such as referring to all flys that somehow entered the classroom on a hot day as "enemy stands", and all of the students were cracking the fuck up. Principle O'Rourke was so rapt in attention in the interesting material of the class that he almost forgot to monitor for suspicious activity, but he remembered his purpose when Olin started covering Sword Art Online, which Principle O'Rourke personally thought was a dogshit anime for hyper weebs and fake girl gamers. He saw who was in the class, including Shaaz, Jacob, and Samuel. They all seemed to be having a good time, which was expected. "Di molto" said Samuel to express his satisfaction with the class, which was both a Jojo reference and a reference to the fact that Samuel himself was Italian. Principle O'Rourke hated to admit it, as to be honest Samuel made him uncomfortable, but it was honestly pretty fucking good. Principle O'Rourke was absent-mindedly was admiring Jacob's hair, the hair that made him the coolest guy and the biggest ladie's man at 2D High but still very nice, when he felt a hoof on his shoulder and he turned around wildly to see who the hoof belonged to.

It was Donkey from Shrek. The same Donkey from Shrek who was the former crony of Daniel and had galavanted off into disappearance with Daniel and 20 year old Mayor Guiliani three months ago. "Holy fuck" Principle O'Rourke said angrily but with a hint of relief at finally finding some success in his investigation. "You have a lot of nerve showing up here and now in front of me". Donkey from Shrek had no response, which was unusal because normally he filled the room with his random humor from what Princple O'Rourke remembered. Donkey from Shrek made meaningful eye contact with Principle O'Rourke that suggested he wanted to tell him something important, but all he said was "can I stay with you?" as he began slowly backing away deliberately and without breaking eye contact. "He must know something" sleuthed out Principle O'Rourke as he hesitantly followed Donkey from Shrek down the hallway and out of the school. He kept following Donkey from Shrek past school grounds and over small roads, across the neighborhood. Donkey from Shrek never broke eye contact, but he did say "are we there yet?" cryptically every ten minutes or so so that Principle O'Rourke knew he was still engaged. It was only at sundown, after he had been following Donkey from Shrek for almost a whole day, that Principle O'Rourke saw some shit that fucked his mind.

What he saw was the entire ED High class, including new recruits Daniel and 20 year old Mayor Guiliani and even that shitty murderer Ivankov. But once his eyes had initially processed the shock of the fucked-up scene, Principle O'Rourke noticed what Ivankov was holding. "The reality stone." Principle O'Rourke plainly stated with dread. "They found it". The reality stone had not been seen since Thanos was defeated, but even without the other infinity stones it had the power to completely change all of reality. "You BASTARDS!" Principle O'Rourke roared with a vengeance as he charged at Ivankov. But Ivankov was an expert in the art of the hidden blade, and with a smug smirk he unsheathed his dirk and tried to kill Principle O'Rourke the same way he had killed Paul three months ago. Put Principle O'Rourke, who had a very high vertical jump clearance, acted quickly and sailed high over the attack when he saw it coming. He saw the fear in Ivankov's eyes as he panicked and threw the reality stone to Daniel, who caught it flawlessly. Principle O'Rourke turned on detective mode and decided that why Daniel was clearly a bully, he also acted quite dumbly with everything he did. This would not end well. But it was too late. "REALITY STONE!" shouted Daniel as he held the stone high in the air. There was a blinding flash of red, and tons of fucked up shit came flying out. Even Principle O'Rourke briefly lost consciousness.

Principle O'Rourke awakened at the feeling of a cute creature nuzzling against his face. He was startled to hell and back as he quickly stood up and realized that the cute creature was… a porg? From Star Wars? "Holy fuck" gasped Princple O'Rourke, "that isn't a real creature, porgs only exist in the fictional Star Wars movies." But real it was. Principle O'Rourke heard the roar of the great black dragon Drogon, which he recognized from the hit HBO series Game of Thrones, which he had wanted to watch but then decided ultimately not to when all of his friends said the last season wasn't actually that good. He then heard a yelling in the distance.

"What kind of fucking Paradise City is this you fuckup?! You were supposed to make Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory real, you fucking moron! Hells Bells, I'm thunderstruck that you're suck a dumbass that you made *all* fictional characters instead of just Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory real. Do you realize what a nightmare this is? Welcome to the fucking jungle, but there is not fun and games!" Ivankov was screaming at Daniel, who was apparently too dumb to properly harness the reality stone, as Principle O'Rourke had predicted all along. What he heard however troubled him to his very core. Ivankov then screamed as he was quickly exploded by a Creeper that Principle O'Rourke recognized from the popular video game Minecraft. He knew Minecraft was a made up and not real game, but now Creeper was here and had killed the bastard Ivankov. "Heh, I guess it's not all bad" thought Principle O'Rourke, somewhat pleased for the first time in three months. "I still can't believe this shit though, what a wild ride." It was then that Principle O'Rourke felt an icy skeleton hand on his shoulder. It was then that he saw Captain Barbosa from Pirates of the Carribean, the hit Disney film. He was another fictional (or formerly fictional, Principle O'Rourke realized with a sinking gulp) character that was now real. Principle O'Rourke noticed that he was in his cursed skeleton form from the first movie. Captain Barbosa then spoke with a pirate's laugh "You best start believing in ghost stories, Principle Beto O'Rourke. You're in one!"


	4. Spoiler title

Chapter 4: All of the fictional characters are real now

[Writer's note: This one is pretty plot heavy, but there is a lot of lore building and there's even some stuff for the fella's and ladie's wanting a little romance 😉. I hope you like it]

Principal O'Rourke was completely tuckered out. He had barely survived at the ground zero of where Daniel had fucked up using the reality stone and made all fictional characters real, instead of just Sheldon from the Big Bang theory. After all, even the rotten Ivankov had been exploded by Creeper from Minecraft, so certainly anything was possible and nobody was safe in this new fucked up reality that Daniel Bowen had caused. He had just escaped the skeleton grip of the cursed form of Captain Barbosa from Pirates of the Caribbean, but that didn't mean he was safe at all even though the undead pirate was content simply chortling at the situation they were all in. There were porgs everywhere, which were actually really cute and didn't pose much of a problem, but there were also dragons as previously mentioned and even worse things. Principal O'Rourke had just begun running as soon as he could remember how to run, but he saw such cursed creatures as Jar Jar Binks from Star Wars who's presence had ruined Principal O'Rourke's entire childhood. He even saw Pennywise the monster clown from It, which was also a movie just seconds before Daniel had used the reality stone. Principal O'Rourke was finally resting when he felt something wrap around his throat. He looked down as he began to choke but he saw nothing there. It was only too late that he realized that it was Randall, a purple chameleon monster from Monsters Inc. Monster's Inc was previously a fictional Disney/Pixar movie that Principal O'Rourke had been charmed by as a young adult, but now Randall was real and was about to kill him by choking him. Ghosts were not real except for fictional ghosts like Casper the Friendly ghost, even after Daniel Bowen had used the reality stone, but if Paul's ghost did exist and was watching the situation Principal O'Rourke was sure that it would have exasperatingly said "what the fuck?!" at this ironic twist of fate. Principal O'Rourkes vision was fading from death as the life was squeezed from him by Randall.

It was then that Randall became visible and relaxed his grasp on Principal O'Rourke as he fell to the ground, dead. A big ol' ice crystal had exploded out of the back of his head like when a pipe freezes and explodes, but with a lot more blood as Principal O'Rourke observed disgusted but relieved. "Huh?!" mused Principal O'Rourke aloud, until he turned around to see from where the ice had came. It was Elsa from Frozen, Anna from Frozen's older sister. "Finally, someone who isn't just another goddam shitty fictional character" Principal Beto O'Rourke stated with relief. Elsa from Frozen had been famous for a long time, and Principal O'Rourke was aware of her even before her sister Anna from Frozen had been assigned to his high school, 2D High. Elsa from Frozen was much older than Anna from Frozen, almost Principal O'Rourke's age, but she did not let that stop her. Despite all that, Principal O'Rourke realized with a fluttering hunger in his chest, Elsa from Frozen was actually kind of hot and, if he was so bold as to admit, was actually pretty sexy as well. She had legs for days as well as an ass that didn't quit, and ice powers.

"Hey, thank you" said Principal O'Rourke charmingly, testing the waters with the frosted vixen. "Oh, it's no problem" said Elsa from Frozen shyly, blushing prettily. This was not lost on Principal O'Rourke, who smiled. "Not that I don't appreciate the favor of you saving me, but should you really be out in the woods with all these fictional assholes? You could get exploded by Creeper from Minecraft or eaten by Pennywise the Clown from It amongst god know's what else!" said Principal O'Rourke. "I have someone you need to meet, please come with me" said Elsa from Frozen. It was there that Principal O'Rourke noticed one of his students, Rebecca, was there in full riding gear on a majestic horse. "I have been riding all of my life, I can lead you safely to Elsa from Frozen's ice palace where were can speak freely. We have to save the world from the fictional characters and the losers who go to ED High" said Rebecca. She was much nicer and more interesting that Principal O'Rourke had initially thought, he thought shamefully as he learned a powerful lesson about not judging people too harshly before you got to know them. He hopped on the majestic horse and they rode off.

After quite a long ride, the unlikely party had reached Elsa from Frozen's ice palace. It was huge and made completely of ice, but it wasn't even melting at all because of Elsa from Frozen's enchantingly powerful abilities. "Woah…" said Principal O'Rourke, becoming aroused. Not only was Elsa from Frozen an appropriate age for him and sexy as hell, but her ice abilities were quickly evident to be OP. He almost forgot how shitty of a night he was having for but just a moment, before he got to the main throne room of the ice palace and saw Donkey from Shrek standing in the court.

"YOU" said Principal O'Rourke with a silent intensity that would sew fear into the heart of any man, let alone donkey. "Would you like to explain that shit to me?" But Donkey from Shrek was determined to tell his side of the tale, and he was not turned from the scary look that Principal O'Rourke was giving him at all. "Listen Principal O'Rourke. I've done some fucked up shit in my time, shit you wouldn't even believe, when I was a crony of Daniel but now it is time for me to come clean. When I came to you in the Anime and Manga Theory class on that fateful day I had known that Daniel must be stopped, where that we were not just too late to stop him from unleashing the frightfully destructive power of the reality stone. Daniel has gone from a strong but dumb bully to straight up maniac thanks to the creepy students at ED High, and he will strike again with a different infinity stone such as perhaps the time or mind stone if we don't undo this and stop him in his tracks. We were given a second chance to set things right because Daniel wasn't able to properly harness the power of the reality stone, but if he gets it back from Drogon and uses it again he will surely be able to make Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, the only character that he did not make real, real. We can't let him do that." It made a lot of sense to Principal O'Rourke, but he still had some questions.

"I still have some questions Donkey from Shrek, however might I remind you that I still am your principal after all. Doesn't Daniel still have the stone? What is this about Drogon, that's the dragon from Game of Thrones, right? And why does ED High want to make Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory real?" Donkey from Shrek did not balk even once as he quickly but calmly answered the questions. "Well, the reason that he does not immediately use the reality stone again is that because when all of the fictional characters except for Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory exploded out of the reality stone, Drogon had roared and realized that the reason there was so much destruction in the world was not because of the creepy guys at ED High, but because the power of the infinity stones were too much for mortals to comprehend in the first place. He at first tried to destroy it with his dragon flames, but then when he could not do that he instead took it in his own claws and flew off to only god knows where to safeguard it, like Smough from The Hobbit. So now nobody can use it, and we can't undo any of this, until we get it back. As for why ED High wanted to make Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory real, that shit should be obvious. They were a rejected loser high school full of creepers, but any high school that had Sheldon from the Big Bang theory, the biggest show on CBS that ran for 12 seasons, would be—" "-would be the most powerful high school in the country", finished Principal O'Rourke solemnly. Of course, it was so obvious to him now. How had he not known that those shitty bastards would try to use the reality stone for this purpose? He should have been more careful.

"But wait a minute, you ass" said Principal O'Rourke, cheekily referring to Donkey from Shrek's species. "Give me one goddamn reason that I should listen to a shitstain crony of Daniel like you. You could have been lying through your very teeth this entire time. Give me one reason I shouldn't have your head on a spike." "Because that's what friends do, THEY FORGIVE EACH OTHER!" said Donkey from Shrek, putting his front hooves on Principal O'Rourke's chest pleadingly. Shit, he was right thought Principal O'Rourke. He fought back tears in his eyes as he felt the true power of friendship, which was well known as the strongest power in the universe even before the people of Earth knew Thanos's name. "Fine, friends", Said Principal O'Rourke. "Oh, I'm so happy!" said Elsa from Frozen, flashing a bright smile to Principal O'Rourke, only increasing his confidence. It was then that he had what he surely thought would be a great idea. "Wait a minute, Donkey from Shrek" Principal O'Rourke said slowly with a growing smile on his face. "If we get the reality stone and make all of the fictional characters fictional again, we could then use the reality stone to make Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory real and have him attend 2D High. And if we do that…" he let the words hang in the air. A huge smile spread on Donkey from Shrek's face in a bad ass way as he said the words Principal O'Rourke had been thinking.

"We win."

They had been riding for hours on horseback to Drogon's rocky seaside fortress. Rebecca, having grown up around horses, had been able to sing the song of the earth to cause a whole stampede of fast and swift horses to appear to bring them on their journey, and to serve as decoys from Drogon the Dragon's flames if need be. "This is really cool" thought Principal O'Rourke more than once on their journey, but if he was totally telling the truth he was thinking more about the crush he had on Elsa from Frozen, and he was pretty sure she felt the same way. Elsa's horse was ice shaking on a sheet of ice that she kept creating right in front of it, so she moved swiftly but with a feminine grace that Principal O'Rourke appreciated. "Hey sweet thing, are you doing anything later?," Donkey from Shrek kept asking some of the horses that Principal O'Rourke assumed must have been good looking female horses, but it never went anywhere.

They had finally arrived. Drogon did not look happy to see them at all, and gave Principal O'Rourke a glare that surely said "If you come close to me and try to use the reality stone, I will burn you despite being a fictional character from an HBO series just a day ago", which was a powerful and particularly self-aware message. "Not even the horses can get past that dragon fire", said Rebecca, the color draining from her face. "I can make it snow, and give you ice armor, but I'm afraid that isn't enough to completely stop those flames. I'm worried about you, Beto" said Elsa from Frozen, her eyes wide with fear. "It will have to be enough, I have to do this Elsa. I have to try." "You won't have to just try", said a voice.

Principal O'Rourke turned around fiercely. What he saw thing made his mind blow chunks of amazement. It was Nijima Makoto from Persona 5 and Emily from Stardew Valley, two fictional video game characters! But unlike all of the previous fictional characters he saw so far, they were not trying to attack him. Instead, Makoto shook his hand. "I don't understand…" said Principal O'Rourke, "you want to… help us erase you from existence and become fictional again?" Makoto and Emily both nodded with determination. "Back when we were fictional, nobody loved us more than Paul" Makoto continued, "but then that Ivankov bastard murdered him in cold blood, and now that bastard Daniel who caused all of this shit is working with him and made this mess. It's time to end it. And if you get the reality stone, you can make Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory real and have him go to Paul's high school."

"Thank you…" said Principal O'Rourke, feeling strongly the power of friendship once more. "But… what can you do to help?" He had no clue goddamit, not even one. But his fears were laid arrest when Makoto simply smirked. It was then that Joker from Persona 5, Makoto's canon love interest no matter what shitty internet nerds say, appeared with an electric guitar and began playing the opening riff from "Life Will Change". "Holy FUCK!" said Principal O'Rourke. Makoto then posed and screamed "MARAKUKAJA!" and a bright light appeared. Principal O'Rourke felt his defense sharply rise. "Yes… that could work!" said Elsa from Frozen sweetly. "LET IT GO!" she then screamed, as it then started snowing which weakened the power of fire moves like Drogon's fire breath attack, and Principal O'Rourke found him encased in powerfully insolating ice armor. "Charge him Principal O'Rourke! We'll be focusing on our friendship with all our hearts to give you strength!" said Emily from Stardew Valley. Principal O'Rourke started running at Drogon. The flames hit him from way to far away, and he could tell the ice armor was starting to melt despite the weather effects, but he kept charging to get the reality stone. Just when Principal O'Rourke started to get worried as the ice armor had disappeared, more characters both fictional and real appeared to offer their friendship as well. "Good grief" said Jotaro Kujo, adjusting his hat begrudgingly "You really are a dependable guy, Principal O'Rourke". The mascot of 2D High, a person in a Minion from Despicable Me costume, made a heart shape with their hands, and the space in between the hands began shining with the radiant energy of friendship. "Banana!" said an actual Minion from Despicable Me, who was also there and wanted Principal O'Rourke to succeed. Principal O'Rourke kept charging through with this friendship boost. He could feel his hitpoints starting to drain from the flames as his ice armor had completely disappeared, but the friendship boost along with the Marakukaja allowed his life bar to drain slow enough that he could keep going. But it was going to be really fucking close. "Hey… mind if I join in?" said Dante from the Devil May Cry series, who then took out the demon guitar Nevan from Devil May Cry 3 and began to jam along with Joker to Life Will Change. "For real?!" said Ryuji from Persona 5, who was there now too and having the time of his life. Principal O'Rourke could hear his life going into critical mode as he made it through the last of the flames. He grasped the reality stone in his hand as tightly as he had ever held anything in his life, and focused on his goal. "REAAALITYYYYYY. STOOOOONNNNEEEEE!" yelled Principal O'Rourke with ever last ounce of energy he had. The world then faded to black.

Principal O'Rourke faded back into consciousness at some undetermined time point later. Every part of his body hurt. It hurt to open his eyes. It hurt to breathe. It hurt to talk. But he had to know. "Did… did it work?" he gasped out. He realized now that he was being cradled by Elsa from Frozen, who had tears streaming down her cheeks, so far that they turned into icicles on account of her ice powers. "Yes… you did it Beto. You did it. You can leave the rest to us, you can rest now." She then kissed him full on the mouth. He felt her chilly tears stream onto his face, but to him they were warm with love. After enjoying the kiss, Beto looked around him despite the incredible agonizing pain he was in. He didn't see Drogon. He didn't see any Persona 5 characters. The only Minion he saw was the one that was clearly a mascot costume with a high school student inside. The fictional characters were gone. What he did see, was a tall and slightly awkward looking young man. An awkward looking young man who looked into Beto's eyes and said "a kiss? How is that scientifically logical? I don't remember reading that in my comic books. Cooties!" as a laugh track played. Beto closed his eyes and let all of his muscles relax into nothingness. He had really done it. He had made Sheldon from the Big Band Theory real and had saved the world. He could rest. They had won.

Fin… or is it?


	5. Two Heroes and Funeral

Chapter 5: Two Heroes and Funeral

Of all of the people at 2D High, regardless of age, nobody felt more consistently shitty than Camden the homeroom teacher of class 2DG. Thanos had used all six infinity stones and the infinity gauntlet to kill half the population of the entire universe, and when everyone came back five years later things were kinda fucked up to tell the truth, so now all of his students were at least 20 years of age, if not older. On top of that, all sorts of shit happened because of the infinity stones, and Camden's students in the past have included the likes of Mayor Rudy Guiliani turned 20 on account of meddling with the time stone, and now Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, a fictional character from the hit CBS sitcom about a group of rambunctious nerds trying to make their way in the world that lasted 12 seasons. The show and even Sheldon himself were fictional but a few days ago, but now Sheldon was real and in Camden's homeroom class. Sheldon was the most important high school student in the country, and he was put in Camden's homeroom because Camden was such a good teacher. Camden was a true professional and was always very nice, courteous, and patient no matter what utter bullshit the more dumbass of his students raised each and every morning. But on the inside, he was constantly dumbfucked by their dumbassery. The five years during which he had been killed by Thanos and the infinity stones was quite the nice respite, but now he was alive again after Thanos was defeated and back teaching. But now he was teaching 20 year olds or older, and every new day some new shit arose.

Camden decided that it was time to stop ruminating on the wretched state of the world for a few minutes and do his job, the job he was born to do. He could always just vent about all these fuckers to his friends once school let out, it was the only thing that kept him sane. "Okay class" Camden said with a chipper normalcy, as he always did, as he was the perfect picture of a good homeroom teacher. "I know this is normally when we have one of our classic and meme-worthy discussions, but today we have some important announcements. Announcement #1 is that Daniel and 20-year old Mayor Guiliani no longer go to this school." Daniel was one of the biggest dumbfucks in the entire high school. He wasn't particularly smart, but he was dumb and a bully. Mayor Guiliani was just your classic feckless crony, but de-aged by the time stone. Camden counted what few blessings he seemed to have in this godforsaken fuckhole of a world that those shitty assholes were gone for good. "Vice Principle Joe offered Daniel and 20-year old Mayor Guiliani the choice of either being completely forgiven for everything they did as long as they apologized, or being banished from the high school. Daniel said he never apologized (dumbly no doubt, Camden secretly thought with annoyance in the pit of his stomach) and then both he and 20 year old Mayor Guiliani decided to go to ED High instead. Unfortunately since Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory goes to our high school now, ED High no longer exists."

"To quote from Raiders of the Lost Arc Part 3: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, they chose… poorly" said Sheldon smartly as a huge laugh track came in which was quickly complimented by the laughter of real life people in the class. Camden laughed as well. Normally the fact that every time Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory talked a huge studio audience laugh track boomed for several seconds would bother Camden, like so much shit in this fucked world, but he really did think Sheldon was funny. It was a fucking A pop culture reference. It was humbling to have the opportunity to teach Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, who was a college grad student in the show but was now in high school for some reason. "I guess that's just Thanos and the infinity stones for you" glumly thought Camden with a vengeance. "How bout them apples" said Shalaka, who was originally from Boston before moving to 2D High.

Camden then took a few moments to collect himself as the conflagration of chattering adolescents chittered away with laughter and god only knows what other pointless bs as the universe slowly but surely moved to a cold and unfeeling state of pure entropy. He then smiled his warmest smile as he continued "Ho ho, that's right Sheldon, we won't be seeing them again. Now for Announcement #2. We will be having a funeral for the two heroes who saved our life before being murdered by those damned assholes from ED High, which no longer exists, and helped us win by making Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory real. Those two heroes are Paul and Principal Beto O'Rourke, in case you did not know. Paul used to be a student in this very homeroom before Ivankov murdered him." "Real men don't cry and instead have sex with lots of women, and are smarter than them too" said Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, which was a classic line from the show from what Camden remembered. "We will all be going to the funeral later today instead of going to actual classes" closed Camden before he was interrupted.

"Well, I'm not happy that we are honoring Principal O'Rourke." said Matt, even though nobody had asked. Matt Bizer had just been in a good mood for once because he had been hitting it off with a new girl he had just met, but then she disappeared with Principle O'Rourke used the reality stone to erase all of the fictional characters. He was quite the pathetic creature in Camden's eyes, so he was never mentioned in the story once, but the fact that his new girl friend was fictional was a whole new level of nonsense, in Camden's personal humble opinion. Camden wanted to die of disgust every time Matt opened his mouth, especially now, but since he had to pretend to like all of his students he simply ignored Matt's cringy bullshit as always. Claudia, the gym teacher and the nicest teacher in all the school for good and true, patted Matt on the shoulder reassuringly. The tension in the room was resolved when Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory said "funerals remind me of Schrodinger's Cat, which is a physics experiment" jokingly, and everyone laughed.

The funeral was a beautiful sight. Everyone who had been in the story up until this point, outside of the fictional characters who no longer existed and the ED High fuckwads, was there. The coffins where on the side of a beautiful river, and people were standing in position to the coffins relative to how important they were. Camden saw literally everyone. Shalaka was there, Anna from Frozen was there, the new hero Rebecca was there, as was Donkey from Shrek. Jotaro Kujo and Drake Bell and even the school mascot, a high school student in a Minion from Despicable Me costume that Camden knew to be Sean, was there. Camden saw Elle and the twins and Alex and 80lbs heavier Charlie Day and even Daniella, who was actually crying despite her normally icy demeanor. And of course Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory was there. But what was more surprising was the people Camden didn't recognize. "We're the voice actors from Persona 5" said a woman with a very pleasing voice to Camden's ears. "We felt obligated to come, since the characters we brought to life were so beloved by Paul and were so essential to Principal O'Rourke completing his mission." "I'm Drew Coombs, I voice Dante from Devil May Cry" said another man. As Camden was grazing his eyes amongst all the people who had gathered in place to attend the funeral, he even saw Nick Fury step out from behind a pillar. Nick Fury wasn't mentioned in the story previously but Camden knew he had always been around, since 2D High was so involved with Thanos in general. Everyone was either sobbing or at least looking sad and reverent, which Camden thought was nice. It was then when Elsa from Frozen, who had been Principal O'Rourke's lover, gave her speech.

"It is with a sorrowful heart that we say goodbye to these two heroes. But it is important to remember that that is what heroes are—heroes. Whether they defeat Thanos and bring back half the universe from being dead or set the world straight by erasing all of the fictional characters who the dumb student Daniel accidentally created except for Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, or by simply just standing up for what is right… they are heroes." said Elsa from Frozen, beginning to tear up. "We then should not be sad in their deaths, but instead celebrate their lives and everything they did for us. They are true heroes, and we wish them well."

It was the most beautiful thing Camden had fucking heard ever. He felt something strange when he realized that it was the tears streaming down his cheeks. He had never felt this before, never realized how precious life was. He had nothing but the utmost respect for the two heroes who had risked their life to give the precious gift of this wonderful world to him and everyone else at 2D High. He felt reborn, with a new appreciation for the world, humanity, and especially Paul and Principal O'Rourke. "Thank you…" he whispered, as the zeal to teach to the best of his ability and make the world a better place one step at a time flared up in his heart like a chronic disease, but good. "Not all heroes wear capes, some like the Flash just wear super suits instead" said Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, sagely.

Some time later, Camden was staring off across the bank of the river, contemplating the great gift of life. "Do you think they know?" Camden asked Elsa from Frozen softly. She paused for a moment or two, and then softly responded in kind "They know." Camden smiled with a bittersweet confidence. "Yeah… I guess they do".

He then turned around and went back to class, where he started writing up some lesson plans for new discussion topics. After all, he was the homeroom teacher of class 2DG, and it was time 2 discuss, guys.

THE END! THANK YOU FOR READING!


End file.
